Updated: Mar 14
Maintaining a positive mindset is one of the most important things when you’re working through fertility issues. It’s also one of the hardest. But I’ve got three tricks that can quickly improve your outlook and help you keep your positive fertility mindset.
1. Stop thinking of yourself as infertile.
Labels are a dangerous thing. They’re sneaky. They might not seem terribly important on the surface, but they carry subtext and implication, and your subconscious brain is tuned into all of it.
A label of “infertile” brings with it the implications that you’re broken, that your body doesn’t work right, that you’re never going to be able to conceive, and more. Why on earth would you want to carry all that around?!
So how do you change your thinking?
For starters, read this:
“There is no such thing as infertility; it is a myth! Rarely have I met a woman of childbearing age with all her reproductive organs intact who isn’t capable of bearing children. As long as the anatomical structures are present, a medical diagnosis of “infertility” is often a fallacy. Many factors can cause a woman to have difficulty conceiving, but once these factors are overcome and a woman’s body is restored to health, conception can occur naturally.”
That’s one of my favorite quotes about infertility, and it’s from Dr. Randine Lewis’s book The Infertility Cure.
Why not take a page from her book, and instead of telling yourself that you’re infertile, you can instead reassure yourself that you simply need a little help. It might take you a few tries to figure out exactly the right kind of help, but eventually you’ll get there.
2. Stop “trying to conceive” or “trying to have a baby.”
In the words of the great and wise Yoda, “Do or do not. There is no try.” And he’s absolutely right.
Trying to do something means you might succeed but that you might also fail. Just like with labels, your brain picks up on that possibility which creates all the things you don’t want: hesitancy, fear, stress, etc.
Instead, think and talk about “working toward conceiving” or “working toward having a baby.” The message to your mind and body then becomes that everything you do on your fertility journey is a positive step in the right direction bringing you closer to your goal.
It’s a neat little Jedi mind trick—small but powerful.
3. Make a fertility playlist.
Yes, you read that right. Make a fertility mindset playlist.
I bet you know just what song to put on when you need a good cry. But what about the songs that motivate you to pull yourself back up and keep going? Or the songs that make you feel like dancing? Or the songs that make you feel like an invincible, unstoppable bad-ass?
Make. A. Playlist. I don’t care how cheesy it sounds; I promise that it will work wonders for your positive fertility mindset.
I’ll get you started with some of my favorites. Some of them may be cliché, but I don’t care: if they work, they work!
Eye of the Tiger—Survivor
Fight Song—Rachel Platten
I Will Survive—Gloria Gaynor
This Is Me—The Greatest Showman soundtrack
If you'd like more help cultivating a positive fertility mindset, schedule a free call with me today!